Showing posts with label Harry Potter Countdown. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Harry Potter Countdown. Show all posts

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Harry Potter Countdown!

The last installment of the insanely popular Harry Potter movie franchise comes out later this summer and book bloggers from all over are chomping at the bit waiting for it. Kayleigh from Nylon Admiral is spending the next few weeks counting down to the movie in her own way: she's posting about it. Every week she'll post about a different topic on her blog. She's inviting anyone and everyone to join in.


This Week's Topic: Choose Your Own Topic (As Long As It's Epic)

My Topic: A Very Potter Musical and A Very Potter Sequel 

Anyone know who to credit for this image?

So, you're really big theater nerds and really big Harry Potter nerds--what do you do? If you're Team StarKid, a group of students from the University of Michigan, you combine the two into an epic musical and its inevitable sequel. Written, directed, and performed by college students, A Very Potter Musical and A Very Potter Sequel are both funny, zany, and irreverent tributes to J.K. Rowling's insanely popular book series.

I had a few friends who were obsessed with this when it first debuted on YouTube. They kept telling me how funny it was and quoting it ad nauseum, but I'm going to admit that I didn't have any interest in it at first. It took me until this past December to finally watch it and, when I finally did, I became just as obsessed as they had been. I've introduced several people to it, all of whom are shocked by how decent it is and by how much they love it.

Not sure who created this one, either.

A Very Potter Musical takes place during Harry's second year at Hogwarts, but it follows the events of his 1st, 4th, and 7th year in the novels. Confused? So was I, at first. Basically, Harry, Ron, and Hermione return to Hogwarts for their second year to find that Professor Quirrell has been named the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher. He has convinced Dumbledore to reinstate a house tournament that resembles the Tri-Wizard tournament from the books, except that four students (one from each house) participate. Harry, Draco, Cho, and Cedric are pitted against one another until the final event, when Cedric and Harry both touch the cup and are transported, thanks to Quirrell, to the graveyard where Voldemort will rise again. The rest of the show most resembles books five and seven, in that Harry has to convince everyone that Voldemort is back and the students have to fight him in the end. An added bonus is that Draco's in love with Hermione, which is the funniest thing ever.

A Very Potter Sequel begins right after the first musical ends but, with the cunning use of a Time-Turner, it transports a group of Death Eaters, led by Lucius Malfoy, back in time to Harry's first year in order to make sure that Harry never defeats the Dark Lord. It incorporates elements of books 1, 3, and 5, as well as a cameo appearance by Rita Skeeter and elements of Snape's love for Lily. Upon arriving at Hogwarts, Harry is confronted by the escape of his god-father, Sirius Black, but is helped along by DADA teacher (and Quidditch coach) Professor Lupin. To make matters worse, Harry has to deal with the dreaded Delores Umbridge, who's taken a liking to the flamboyantly gay Albus Dumbledore. Hilarity and chaos ensue as Umbridge and Malfoy join forces to destroy Harry Potter. But someone named "Little D" is helping keep him alive. Will Harry find a way to help Sirius? Will we learn who "Little D" is? And will Lupin ever find a way to keep his werewolf side in check (and his pants on)?

Ditto.

Obviously, not everyone will enjoy it. There's swearing and blatant disregard for character personalities, among other things. But , for one, found it to be hilarious. The acting's pretty decent, as is the singing, and the songs themselves are catchy (you can download the music for AVPM here, AVPS here, and buy the remainder of the AVPS album on iTunes). The best part of all, however, is how fracking quotable they are. Here's just a taste of the over four-hours-worth of super-mega-awesome-foxy-hot:

A Very Potter Musical:

Voldemort: You'd think that killing people would make them like you. But it doesn't. It just makes them dead.

Cedric: Hufflepuffs are particularly good finders.
Dumbledore: What the hell is a Hufflepuff?

Draco: You can't just go to Pigfarts. It's on Mars. You need a rocket ship. Do you have a rocket ship?

Draco: I want Hermione Granger...and a rocket ship!

Ginny: (to an Asian girl) Konichiwa, Cho Chang. It is good to meet you. I am Gin-ny Weas-ley.
Asian Girl: Bitch, I ain't Cho Chang!
Ron: That's Lavender Brown! *smack* Racist sister.

Draco: Do we have to fight? I'm tired. Can't we just be Death Eaters?

Voldemort: Muggles have their place. Mudbloods have their place. And so do your clothes! Namely, a dresser.

Dumbledore: Ooh, 10 points to Dumbledore.

A Very Potter Sequel

Snape: What happened to the poster of headmaster Zefron?
Umbridge: Oh, I don't like Zach Efron. Taylor Lautner's my man.
Snape: What do you want you horrid bitch?

Ron: Favorite Amy Mann song on three. One two three....

Ron and Harry: Red Vines!
Harry: Favorite color vines other than green?
Ron and Harry: Red Vines!
Ron: Favorite way to say 'red wines' in a German accent?
Ron and Harry: Red Vines!....OH MY GOD!
Ron: Where have you been all my life?
Harry: Living in a cupboard under some stairs.

Snape: It pisses me off. I mean it really fucking pisses me off. I was there for her, y’know? And when she needed someone, I was there, waiting like a tool! “Oh, we’re gonna snog now? Okay. What about now? Well, I’ll wait. I’ll wait forever. Like a tool.” And, just one time... just one time, I wanted to take your mum... ‘s boobies... and put them on my face... and go *motorboat*.

Umbridge: So, you're smarter than the person who wrote this book? You're smarter than...Merlin?

Lupin: There's no way we're losing to Slytherin, Ravenclaw, or...Jigglypuff.

And that's not even getting into the songs, which are incredible, especially for a show completely put together by amateurs. My favorites include "Granger Danger" and "Different As Can Be" from A Very Potter Musical and "Guys Like Potter" and "No Way" from A Very Potter Sequel.

Oh, and if there is a higher power, it will ensure that the cast of the final Harry Potter film sings "Voldemort Is Going Down"...even if it's just in a special feature somewhere.

-Gabe

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Harry Potter Countdown

The last installment of the insanely popular Harry Potter movie franchise comes out later this summer and book bloggers from all over are chomping at the bit waiting for it. Kayleigh from Nylon Admiral is spending the next few weeks counting down to the movie in her own way: she's posting about it. Every week she'll post about a different topic on her blog. She's inviting anyone and everyone to join in.


This Week's Topic: The Most Shocking/Unexpected Deaths

Obviously, this post gets a big ol' SPOILER WARNING.

One of my favorite authors is Victor Hugo, despite the fact that by the end of his novels, most of the characters are dead. For example, by the end of The Hunchback of Notre Dame (SPOILER ALERT) Quasimodo, Esmerelda, Frollo, Clopin, and about 8 million other characters have snuffed it. Les Mis is the same way. So, in some respects, is J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter series. While many more characters have survived by the end of Deathly Hallows than have ever survived a Hugo tome, I half expected her to literally nuke everyone in book seven. To me, it would have been a much kinder way to end the novel than that gods-awful epilogue, but I digress. Here, in no particular order, are my picks for the most shocking and/or unexpected deaths in Harry Potter.

1) Dumbledore:

I'm going to be honest and say that I wasn't a huge fan of Dumbledore by the end of book six. I felt that he used pretty much everyone around him for his own ends--Harry, Snape, Sirius, the Order of the Phoenix, etc.--and that, in some cases, the ends didn't really justify the means. I'm not saying that he was evil or anything, just that he had a bad habit. Regardless, I wasn't expecting his death at all. Or, at least, I wasn't until someone blabbed about it on the internet before I had a chance to even read the book. The scandal of the leaked page hit home when I stumbled across it before the release of the book. Personally, I wasn't angry about his death but I was angry that someone had ruined the book for me in advance...and on purpose. The most shocking thing about it for me wasn't that he had died or that it was Snape who had killed him. Instead, what shocked me was that I could find so few people who believed as I did--that Snape had done it out of pity and at Dumbledore's request. The "please" that he says to Snape right before the Avada Kedavra curse is administered was all the proof I needed to solidify my case that Snape was, in fact, a good guy. Others said that it was Dumbledore pleading for his life. Well, we all know who was right now, don't we?

2) Dobby:

I think I'm one of the only people in the universe who actually came to really like Dobby. I know that there are others out there, but for the most part, people I talk to found him to be obnoxious. Even those people, however, were shocked and saddened by his death in Deathly Hallows. He died being a hero, which is great and all, but, like many of the deaths in the seventh book, it just seemed so unnecessary. It was as if she was trying to pack in as much death as possible. I mean, Hedwig died, for frack's sake! I won't be using any more deaths from the last book in this list because I think that Dobby sort of personifies them all. Fred, Lupin, Tonks, Hedwig, etc., etc., etc.: every single one of these deaths was pointless and none of them really served to move the story along. The only death I actually expected in Deathly Hallows was Snape, surprisingly enough. I hadn't expected his death to be so lame, but I knew going into it that Snape wasn't long for this world. I only wish she had given him a more fitting, dignified death. Anyway, back to Dobby--I didn't see his death coming and I will admit to crying like a baby at it.

3) Sirius Black:

After Snape, Sirius is my favorite character in the whole series. I found his death to be both anti-climactic and unfitting for his character. He falls through a fracking veil into gods knows what and we never really find out exactly what happened to him. Yes, he died in battle but he didn't die because of the battle. If he had been clumsy, he could have met the same end without Bellatrix's help--"Oops, look at that, I've tripped!" Somehow, we were supposed to all just accept that he's gone somewhere else and that he can't come back as a ghost and yet he can be with the Marauders at the end of book seven. Yeah, okay. What peeved me off the most about his death, though, is that there were other ways of making sure that Harry didn't go live with him. I know that the point was to make it so that Harry eventually loses all of his father figures and is, therefore, completely alone in the world (you know, except for his friends) but I'm still not completely convinced that this was the way to go about it. Part of me even thinks that she just killed him off because she couldn't think of anything else to do with him. He'd served his purpose and now she was ready to discard him like a used tissue. Okay, so maybe I'm a little bitter.


-Gabe

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Harry Potter Countdown!

Kayleigh at Nylon Admiral is anxiously counting down the weeks to the release of the last Harry Potter film, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows, Part II. Each week she posts about a different topic relating to Rowling's insanely popular series and invites other bloggers to join her. 


This week's topic is one that's close to my heart, more so than any other topic she's covered so far. Today we're all going to be talking about:


"Snape. Snape. Severus Snape."


(Raise your hands if you mentally added the word "Dumbledore!" to the end of that. Click here if you have no idea what I'm talking about.)


NOTE: Here there be spoilers!


Those of you who've been following me for a while will know that Snape has been my favorite character since the first book. I've droned on and on about him at length since I started blogging in March and I've said pretty much all there is to say about him. He's morally gray, which is my favorite kind of character. He and I have a similar childhood, so I identify with him more than the other characters. He's an absolute bastard but he shows repeatedly that he has a heart buried somewhere deep in his chest. Etc. Etc. Etc.


So, what else is there to say about our favorite potions master? I've decided to do something a little unconventional today. After I'd finished reading the series, I was ridiculously unhappy with the way things turned out for Snape and was heartbroken that we'd be seeing no more of him (or the other characters, for that matter). As a writer, I sometimes find that when I'm having writer's block, it helps to write fan fiction. Yes, I know that it's looked down on by a lot of people, but working with other people's characters and developing your own plot and dialogue can be a great way to help work through writing issues without having to worry about creating brand new characters. 




You can see where this is headed, I'm sure. I decided in a moment of "Holy crap, I have no idea where I want my current novel to go!" to start working on the autobiography of one Severus Snape. Lame? Probably. Helpful? Yes. Something I intend to finish some day? Damn straight. Because Snape is such a versatile, shadowy, and down-right awesome character, he's immensely fun to write. Below, you'll find some excerpts from what's being tentatively called The Life and Death of Severus Snape. Some of the text is taken directly from Rowling's novels (NO COPYRIGHT INFRINGEMENT IS INTENDED!!!! and I don't ever intend for this to leave my computer), but quite a bit of if is just from my (probably deranged) head. All of these excerpts are scenes from the Sorcerer's Stone timeline.


"Draco Malfoy Puts Snape on Edge"

          I’ve heard students say that I don’t walk, I stalk. Whether or not that’s true, I could feel myself stalking into my classroom that Friday. It was, I knew, my first lesson with Potter and I felt particularly moody. The idea of Lilly’s son being in my general vicinity was like a dagger being thrust into my heart. In fact, as I came to his name on the roll I felt a twinge of pain and I couldn’t stop myself from a little unpleasantness.
            “Ah, yes,” I said softly, “Harry Potter. Our new—celebrity.”
            Pushing aside the urge to snap out at him, to demand to know how he could have the audacity to sit there looking out of those eyes, her eyes, not knowing the battle that was raging inside of my head, I continued down the roll, then looked out at the first years.
            “You are here to learn the subtle science and exact art of potion-making,” I began, staring them down, measuring them up. “As there is little foolish wand-waving here, many of you will hardly believe this is magic. I don’t expect you will really understand the beauty of the softly simmering cauldron with its shimmering fumes, the delicate power of liquids that creep through human veins, bewitching the mind, ensnaring the senses.” Here I stopped and let my words sink in. As I had expected, no one seemed very impressed by what I’d said, but there was the slightest glimmer in a few of the students’ eyes. “I can teach you how to bottle fame, brew glory, even stopper death—if you aren’t as big a bunch of dunderheads as I usually have to teach.”
            There was a ringing silence. I saw Potter exchange a glance with a boy that I would have pegged as a Weasley even if I hadn’t seen his name on the roll. It was, I decided, time to see what the Potter boy was made of.
            “Potter!” I snapped. “What would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?”
            His confusion was palpable. Another glance at Weasley, then one at Hermione Granger, whose hand had shot up out of nowhere.
Oh no, I thought. A know-it-all.
            “I don’t know, sir,” he said finally.
            I felt my lips curl into a sneer. “Tut, tut—fame clearly isn’t everything.” I paused. “Let’s try again. Potter, where would you look if I told you to find me a bezoar?”
            Several students snickered and Granger’s hand shot even higher into the air, but Potter just looked down at his desk and repeated, “I don’t know, sir.”
            “Thought you wouldn’t open a book before coming, eh, Potter?” Then, “What is the difference, Potter, between monkshood and wolfsbane?” I was, I knew, enjoying this too much.
            “I don’t know,” he admitted, glancing again at Granger. She was standing up, practically jumping up and down in an effort to get my attention. “I think Hermione does, though, why don’t you try her?”
            “Sit down!” I snapped at Granger. “For your information, Potter, asphodel and wormwood make a sleeping potion so powerful it is known as the Draught of Sleeping Death. A bezoar is a stone taken from the stomach of a goat and it will save you from most poisons. As for monkshood and wolfsbane, they are the same plant, which also goes by the name of aconite.” I glared at him then snapped, “Well? Why aren’t you all copying that down?” I looked at Potter, saying loudly enough for everyone to hear, “And a point will be taken from Gryffindor House for your cheek, Potter.”
            I strode up the board, flicked my wand, and watched as the directions for a cure for boils swirled out onto it. “Pair up with the person you are next to,” I said, “and carefully follow these directions. I cannot stress enough the importance of strict adherence to what is written up here. To not do so could be dangerous—even deadly. You may begin.”
            I had expected the first years to be incompetent—they always were—but it pained me to see so many mistakes being made with the easiest of directions. “Not crushed finely enough,” I told a Slytherin boy. “I think you’ll find that’s too much dried nettles, Finnigan.”
            Draco Malfoy caught my eye and as I looked at his friend Goyle’s completely wrong potion—“That ingredient isn’t even on the list!”—he said, “Father says to say hello, Professor.”
            “Does he now?” I replied, staring down into the depths of his cauldron.
            “Oh yes. He says that you two are old friends.” There was something shrewd and calculating in his look. I could tell that he, like Potter, had not fallen far from the proverbial tree.
            “And what else does he say, Mr. Malfoy?”
            He shrugged but it was too forced to be casual. “Not much, really.” I started to walk away but stopped when I heard him say, “Only that he would hate to find out that you and I weren’t getting on well. He’s very protective of me, Professor.” I could feel his eyes boring into the back of my head. “Very protective.”
            I swiveled around to face him again. “I see. Well, Malfoy,” I said over the chatter of the other students, “this looks perfect. Just perfect.” I hoped that my voice didn’t sound strained. “If everyone could look over here at the way Draco has stewed his horned—”
            I was cut off by a loud hissing noise that was coming from the same cauldron as clouds of foul green smoke. All over the room people were leaping onto stools to get out of the way of the potion leaking out of a melted cauldron, eating the soles of shoes. A fat Gryffindor boy—Nathan? Neville?—was moaning in pain as boils popped up all over his body.
            “Idiot boy!” I rushed over and cleared away the potion with a wave of my wand. “I suppose you added the porcupine quills before taking the cauldron off the fire?” The moaning continued and I pointed to his partner. “Take him up to the hospital wing.” Potter and his friends were sitting next to the mess and I must admit that I took my anger over Malfoy’s words and the potion fiasco out on them. “You—Potter—why didn’t you tell him not to add the quills? Thought he’d make you look good if he got it wrong, did you?” Before he could sputter an answer I added, “That’s another point you’ve lost for Gryffindor.”
            My face burning with rage, I wiped the directions off the board and slipped out of the room and into my office, not daring to look back at Malfoy or The Boy Who Lived. 


"Lucius Malfoy Makes It Worse"



           “Severus, I see you are well.”
            I could feel the blood pulsing through my veins, my heart beating wildly against my chest. He never came to me here in my office. He also never paid social calls. Nothing good could come from this meeting.
            “Lucius,” I said, hoping my tone didn’t betray the anxiety that I felt, “to what do I owe the…pleasure of this visit?”
            I looked up briefly from the copy of The Daily Prophet I had been immersed in to see him gazing absentmindedly at the jars on my shelves. He had always been an imposing figure. His proud manner had once enthralled me and I had spent my years at Hogwarts adoring him. Now, however, I found myself merely hoping that he would leave and never come back.
            “It’s my son, Draco,” he said.
            I set the Prophet aside. “Ah, yes. He’s quite the promising potions-maker,” I lied.
            Lucius’ head swiveled around and his grey eyes pierced me. Still I did not look at him.
            “Is he now?” he asked smoothly. “Well, that’s just…wonderful.” He settled into the chair in front of my desk. “Unfortunately that is not what I’ve come to discuss. Or, really,” he corrected, “that is only part of it. Are you, by chance, familiar with the name Galena Malfoy?”
            “No, I can’t say that I am.”
            “How about Trevor Black?”
            “By last name only,” I admitted, not entirely sure where this conversation was headed but knowing that I probably wouldn’t like it.
            “Malachi Forge? Joshua Tibbert? Christiana Stone?” At each of these names I had shook my head but, rather than being displeased, Lucius’ thin, cold smile grew at each sign of my ignorance. “Just what I wanted to hear, Severus. You have not heard of these people because they are unimportant. They are nonentities. They, in short, do not matter.” He leveled his gaze on me and I made the mistake of looking up at just that moment. Our eyes met and I was caught in his serpentine stare. “Do you catch my meaning?”
            “I’m afraid I don’t,” I said, trying to look away. It was a lie, but I wanted to hear it from him. I wanted him to openly admit to what both he and his son had hinted at.
            “Don’t play dumb with me, Severus. I’m certain that Draco has spoken with you.”
            “Draco,” I countered, “has done little more than insinuate. Which, I might add, is what you’re doing right now.”
            Lucius leaned forward and gripped the edge of my desk. “Draco is my only child, one of the last of the Malfoy line. His mother and I both feel as if he is destined for greatness—and we want you to help him achieve it.”
            I stood up, almost knocking over my chair in the process. “Lucius, if you think for one moment that I’m going to play into your delusions of grandeur—”
            “It’s very simple,” he interrupted, acting as if nothing had happened. “All you’d have to do is help him along, make sure he’s doing his best…tutor him if need be.”
            “As if I haven’t got enough to deal with already.”
            “Yes,” he said, his voice barely a whisper. “I can see how very trying it would be to sit in Dumbledore’s pocket and plot against every fool he hires for the Defense Against the Dark Arts post.”
            “You’re being unfair.”
            “I’m being unkind. There is a marked difference. Don’t forget that I sit on the board of directors, Severus. This is merely an inconvenience. I am capable of much, much worse.”
            It was not an empty threat. He knew that to get me fired would be the worst possible thing he could do. This was my home, my life. It was the only way that I could fulfill my promise to Dumbledore.
            The choice was mine to make. I could take the brave route and stand up to him, refuse to give in to his threats. Or I could take the safer route—the cowardly route—and do whatever he asked of me.
            I didn’t speak for quite a while. Instead, I weighed my options, carefully considering both. Did I really think myself capable of defiance? No. But, was I willing to allow myself to become the guardian of yet another brat—yet another reminder of my past?
            No.
            “Will you give me some time to think about it?” I asked.
            “Is more time really necessary? I mean, I’d think that your choice was clear.” He smirked. “Or were you thinking of doing something noble?”
            The truth was that I had been thinking of doing something violent…like punching him.
            “Your job or your pride?” he said, then added maliciously, “Not that you’ll have much pride once you’ve lost everything.”
            Again I forced the urge to hurt him down. I thought hard about this. There really wasn’t an option, I conceded. The way was clear.
            Reluctantly, but with my head held aloft, I said, “Draco will live up to your expectations, Lucius. I swear it.”
_________________________

Okay, so they're a bit long, but I liked them both and couldn't choose between them. I really like the idea that Snape only helped Draco as much as he did because he was afraid of Lucius. He could have ruined Snape several times over with everything that he knew about him and I never saw any real reason why Snape would have been so openly on Draco's side. I also just like the idea that Snape was being forced to help both Harry and Draco, mortal enemies since the day they met. It adds even more tension to an already tense story line.

-Gabe

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Harry Potter Countdown!

The last installment of the insanely popular Harry Potter movie franchise comes out later this summer and book bloggers from all over are chomping at the bit waiting for it. Kayleigh from Nylon Admiral is spending the next few weeks counting down to the movie in her own way: she's posting about it. Every week she'll post about a different topic on her blog. She's inviting anyone and everyone to join in.


This week's topic: Tell us your favourite and least favourite aspect of the film series


There's so much that I could talk about in terms of the films--the casting, the sets, the way they brought the wizarding world to life. Instead, I've decided to talk about two smaller bits. One was added in for the film and is absolutely genius. The other was added for the film and drives me insane.


THUMBS UP: Snape saves the kids' lives at the Whomping Willow (POA)


In the third film (and book), Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, Harry, Ron, and Hermione follow the secret passage through the Whomping Willow and into the Shrieking Shack in Hogsmeade where they discover Sirius Black has been hiding. Professor Lupin, who is a werewolf (this is important later on), is there as well and he and Sirius both explain the real story behind Sirius being imprisoned in Azkaban. Professor Snape comes into the Shack wearing Harry's Invisibility Cloak and, not having heard what was said, naturally (for him) assumes the worst. Fast forward a little bit, now. The crew is coming out of the Whomping Willow, the full moon comes out, and Lupin transforms into a werewolf. Now, in the book Snape does nothing at this point as he's still unconscious from being hit with several Expelliarmus spells. In the film, however, Snape does something wonderful..and so small that some people may have even missed it. As Lupin is bounding hungrily towards the three kids, Snape steps in front of them and holds his arms out to protect them. It's one of my favorite moments in the entire film franchise. I love that Snape puts himself in danger to keep the kids safe, showing that he cares about the school and about its students more than he does about his own skin, something that he proves again later on in the series. After book six, when I was getting into arguments with people about whether Snape was good or bad, I could point to this moment and say, "Would Rowling have allowed this to happen in the film if Snape was really an evil guy?" He really dislikes the trio so it would seem out of character to help them, especially if he was a true Death Eater. This moment above all others reveals Snape's character and, regardless of whose idea it was (I'm going to guess that it was Rickman's), I absolutely love it. 


THUMBS DOWN: Harry and Hermione boogie down (DH1)


Dear Harry Potter cast and crew: What the hell was this? Okay, I get that they're in a bad situation and they're trying to bring some joy into their life, but this? Not only did I find this to be unnecessary and obnoxious, but I think about all the really cool scenes from other books that weren't included in the films and I wonder why those didn't make the cut and yet this did. It wasn't in the book, it didn't need to be in the movie. I felt physically uncomfortable throughout this entire part, not because two people dancing disturbs me or anything, but because it comes out of nowhere and was just so awkward. So, I guess uncomfortable wasn't the word I was looking for. Embarrassed was what I was going for. I was physically embarrassed for these two during the entire scene. Rant over.


-Gabe

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Harry Potter Countdown!

The last installment of the insanely popular Harry Potter movie franchise comes out later this summer and book bloggers from all over are chomping at the bit waiting for it. Kayleigh from Nylon Admiral is spending the next few weeks counting down to the movie in her own way: she's posting about it. Every week she'll post about a different topic on her blog. She's inviting anyone and everyone to join in.

This week's topic: The relationships in Harry Potter; which worked and which do I wish Rowling never even attempted?


When you get as involved in a book series as I did with Harry Potter, you tend to see the characters as friends (or enemies) and you feel the need to either give these characters encouragement or tell them when they're being stupid. Of course, as they are fictional characters living in a book, they obviously aren't going to hear you or take your angry shouting into consideration.

I like to call this the "Don't Go into the House Alone!" syndrome. We all do it. We do it when we're watching our favorite TV show and our favorite character has just started dating the slimeball that no one likes. Or we could be watching a horror film and the beauty queen is making a fatally stupid move by, as the title suggest, going into the house alone. We know the killer is there but she doesn't and, no matter how much we yell at our TV, the person on the screen continues on her merry way...until she gets stabbed with an ice pick.

When I read the Harry Potter books the first time around, I suffered from "Don't Go into the House Alone!" syndrome like nobody's business. I yelled at Harry not to go find Sirius at the Ministry. I told him not to go with Moody after the return of Voldemort during the Tri-Wizard Tournament. Harry is just not a good listener.

Anyway, some of my yelling had to do with relationships, which, after all, is what we're supposed to be talking about today. There were some couples that I was so glad got together in the end, there were some that I was disappointed never made it together, and there were others where I started to wonder if maybe J.K. Rowling had officially lost her ever-loving mind. We'll look at each of these in turn.

The Good: 


First Place: Ron and Hermione:

This is my favorite eventual pairing in the books, although they aren't my favorite couple in the world of Harry Potter. Ron and Hermione's relationship grew naturally over the course of seven years and because of that it was a much stronger, much more realistic relationship. These two went through periods of intense dislike towards each other, never fully comprehending that their supposed hatred was actually love. Unlike quite a lot of the couples in this series, Ron and Hermione didn't just magically fall in love one day with no real explanation. They formed a deep bond and a lasting friendship and then they built up a romantic relationship...without even realizing they were doing it.

Runner-Up: Molly and Arthur Weasley

Miss Congeniality: Hagrid and Madam Maxime

The Bad:


First Place: Lupin and Tonks:

I have a feeling that Lupin and Tonks take the prize in everybody's "What the Hell Was Rowling Thinking?" contest. Not only was there no evidence of actual love between the two of them, the whole thing just happened out of nowhere. I know, I know, there was that whole Patronus thing and a few other vague "hints." Even with all of that, the relationship always seemed so one-sided. Tonks obviously had a thing for Lupin, but he seemed only to be in it for her sake. Granted, he was a werewolf and was worried about having a family, but not even that was enough of a reason for him to not want to get together with her. Personally, I just never really bought them as a couple. Even Ginny and Harry were somewhat realistic. Lupin and Tonks, not so much.

Runner-Up: Harry and Ginny

Miss Congeniality: Bill and Fleur

The Imaginary:


I admit that I'm a shipper. Some of the couples that I wish would get together are conventional, others are not. Here is my list of ships, both het and slash.

First Place: Sirius and Snape

Judge me all you want, but for some reason I always wanted the two of these guys to get together. Even with the bad blood between them, I wished for even just a little sexual tension. I know Rowling would never have done that (although I give her mad props for saying that Dumbledore was gay) so this pairing only exists in (usually) poorly written fanfic.

Runner-Up: Neville and Luna

Miss Congeniality: Draco and Ginny

-Gabe

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Harry Potter Countdown!

Kayleigh at Nylon Admiral is anxiously awaiting the last Harry Potter film like the rest of us, but she's actually doing something about it. Every week until the movie comes out, she'll be discussing a different aspect of the series in her Harry Potter Countdown. Anyone is welcome to join, so head on over there and check it out.

This week she's discussing favorite characters. Here's my list, in no particular order:

1) Severus Snape

I'm pretty sure that not a week has gone by in the last few months that I've been blogging that I haven't mentioned how much I like Snape. Even though he's a miserable bastard with a grudge who made poor lifestyle choices as a teenager, Snape is, and always will be, my favorite Harry Potter character. He's a multi-faceted guy with a painful history who spends his whole life trying to make up for his biggest mistake: allowing the woman he loved to die. While I'm really NOT a fan of Snape/Lilly, I think that his devotion, although bordering on crazyobsessivestalker, is touching and adds to a character that I identified with since practically the beginning of the series.

2) Lucius Malfoy

I'm a villain fanatic, especially when those villains are cold and calculating rather than screaming psychopaths. Lucius fits that bill to a "t." He's calm, snobby, quietly angry, and, in the end, he puts being a father before being a genocidal maniac. Malfoy's history with Snape always intrigued me and I wish that Rowling had gotten into their relationship better. I always felt that Snape was like the obnoxious little brother, tagging along everywhere with Lucius, trying to fit in. If Rowling ever gets around to doing prequels about the first war against Voldemort (and I sincerely hope that she does), I'm hoping that she'll delve into the Death Eaters more than she did in the original series because, quite frankly, I find a lot of them more interesting than some of the Order of the Phoenix characters.

3) Sirius Black

Sirius Black is my second-favorite character, getting beaten out only by Snivellus...I mean Severus. As my favorite Marauder, Sirius stood out from the moment he was introduced in Prisoner of Azkaban. I wanted to know more about him and I was hopeful that he'd become a permanent fixture in the series. And then she fracking killed him. Thanks, Rowling. Thanks a lot. Harry's godfather had his faults but he was, at heart, a good man. His real issue was being falsely imprisoned in Azkaban at such a young age, which stunted his emotional growth, leading to him acting childish and not quite being able to live fully in the present. He was always thinking of the good old days and never came to grips with the fact that Harry and James were two very different people. I'm not ashamed to admit that I cried for a full hour after finishing Order of the Phoenix. I had really been looking forward to Harry (and Sirius) getting some stability and closure in their lives. But, alas, it was not meant to be.

4) Neville Longbottom

It's been said that when Chuck Norris goes to sleep at night, he checks under his bed for Neville Longbottom. Chubby, frightened Neville started out on the wrong foot at Hogwarts. He was teased by the Slytherins, got full-on body bound by Hermione, and managed to help (alleged) psychopathic criminal Sirius Black into Gryffindor common room. Throughout the series, however, he grew as a character, as a person, and as a wizard. By book seven, he had learned how to take care of himself and was standing up for what he knew in his heart to be right. He even got his grandmother to respect him...and that's no easy task. To top it all off, Neville pulled the Sword of Gryffindor out of the Sorting Hat and used it to kill Nagini, one of Voldemort's horcruxes. Neville Longbottom is a B.A.M.F.

5) Luna Lovegood

As Hogwarts' resident conspiracy theorist, Luna Lovegood is a bit eccentric for some of the students. But for readers, she's an lovable oddity who tends to have her finger on the pulse of exactly what's happening around her. Despite being flighty, Luna's no idiot; she simply looks at the world through a unique lens. Watching this strong young woman face dangers that some of the "bravest" men would quail at is wonderful; watching her develop friendships despite being unpopular is even more so. Luna is the character for anyone, male or female, who has ever felt like the odd one out. She's also really funny, although sometimes she doesn't mean to be.

6) Remus Lupin

My other favorite Marauder, Remus Lupin is the only really good DADA professor that Hogwarts ever had. I guess it kind of makes sense considering that he's a werewolf, but he's also a really smart, kind, caring guy. I'm not too happy about how Rowling changed his character towards the end of the series (what the hell was up with that whole Lupin/Tonks thing?) but for the majority of his tenure as a character, Lupin was the voice of reason and the guy who gave really good advice...even if Harry didn't want to listen to it. I found Lupin's ability to keep his humanity despite transforming into a monster every full moon to be a really interesting take on werewolves and it gave him a depth that was refreshing.

7) Nearly-Headless Nick

Gryffindor's resident ghost, Nearly-Headless Nick, just wants to be respected. It's kind of hard when your death rendered you almost-decapitated, leading the actually-headless to look down on you. Nick is a funny character who didn't show up NEARLY enough in the series. But when he was there, he was always memorable. He also tended to be the ghost that helped solve whatever problem Harry and his friends were having at the time, which made him far more useful than Slytherin's ghost, the Bloody Baron. Although I'm a self-professed Slytherin, I have to admit that Gryffindor gets ten house points for having an awesome ghost.

Honorable Mentions:
-Hermione Granger
-Fred and George Weasley
-Gilderoy Lockhart
-Rubeus Hagrid
-Sybil Trelawney
-Mrs. Weasley
-Oliver Wood
-Draco Malfoy

-Gabe